The light of the moon through the paper wall made a checkerboard pattern across the room. From somewhere nearby, the perfume of night blooming jasmine scented the air giving the blue light of night a heady warmth. The sounds of the city didn’t penetrate this far on the edges of civilization and the stillness that covered the dojo was uninterrupted.

Kaoru lay on her back, starring at the ceiling. She was a ship alone in an ocean of silence. The rushing of blood in her ears was like waves against the hull. It had only been a short while that she had been sharing her room, but now the boys had moved in together and tonight the hush reminded her of lonelier times.

Extracting a hand from beneath the covers she brushed an errant tear from her eye.

Across the dojo came the sounds of someone walking softly on the creaking floor and Kaoru smiled.

Kenshin.

Even in the calm of night she could tell his footfalls. Images of laughing, violet eyes suddenly filled her mind and the ocean of silence was no longer so vast. Knowing that he was near, here in the dojo, caused her to release a purr-like sigh and reach into her robe. Her questing fingers found a hidden treasure and pulled out the indigo ribbon she had leant him. She lifted it up into the light, overhead, in her out stretched hands and studied it.

The bloodstain, which she hadn’t washed out, had an inky sheen in the dim light, and the indigo itself a velvety black. It smelled strongly of his sweat and she carefully allowed the very edges to tickle the skin of her face, breathing deeply. It had been her constant companion since that day a week ago. That day he had almost become the Manslayer again, to save her. She let the material fall onto her face and dropped her hands to the floor.

"Kenshin," she whispered into the softness that covered her.

Never before had the ship been in these waters. There were no charts for this voyage and she hesitated. Lifting the ribbon off her face, Kaoru looked into the blue light of the room and saw none of it. The sharp picture of a woman alone suddenly filled her mind. She thought of the nights where all she had to comfort herself were her ideals. But no ship can make a voyage powered by pride alone.

Throwing off the covers, Kaoru rose unsteadily to her feet. The moistness in her eyes momentarily blinded her as she slid open the door and stepped into the warm night air.

The smell of jasmine was stronger here and she reeled. Laying a hand on the doorjam, she steadied herself, dashed the tears from her face and looked out into the night.

Kenshin stood across the court, facing her, a dark outline in the shadows. Several dozen things flashed through her mind to say to him, and all of them died in the next second as an unexpected sob escaped her throat. Shocked by the sound, she pressed a hand to her mouth, in an attempt to suppress any other unintended noises. Kauro took a step back, retreating from her fears. The emotions, however, were not to be denied and suddenly the ship was in old, well-charted waters. She turned to flee, blinded by tears, and darted into her room, throwing the door closed behind her. Sinking to her knees, she fought to silence the crying in her heart, but tonight it was not to be. Clutching herself into a tiny ball, Kauro tried to make as little sound as possible, knowing he was there, knowing he was listening. When the door slid open she was not surprised, but she was angry. Blindly swatting into the air, protestations rising to her lips, Kaoru’s hand was caught and held.

Kenshin knelt in the doorway. Easily, he lifted her into his arms, hugging her hard to his chest. She fought for a few moments, until the fragrance of jasmine, mixing with the scent of the man holding her, penetrated her misery. Slowly she relaxed, unwinding muscle by muscle, and then the ship was in a dead calm. Limp in his arms, totally defenseless, Kaoru awaited direction.

But none came. He said nothing. His head was bowed over her, his face hidden in shadow still and unmoving. Carefully she reached into the darkness, where his smile would await her, and touched his face. Moisture dampened the fingertips that touched his cheek and she gasped in surprise, sitting up to see him better. Brushing his hair back, Kaoru felt her anger rising, expecting to see pity in his eyes; but what she saw took her breath away. Tears began anew as she threw her arms around his neck, clinging to him. Thoughts of apologies choked her voice but his grip on her tightened, crushing her close again.

"We all have dark places," she whispered against his throat, not caring if he could hear or not. And from the safety of his arms she looked out from the prow of the ship into her dark places, and found them not as sinister as she remembered. Puzzled, she turned away, looking back along the ship, to see a figure at the helm. The relief, the sheer liberation of not having to steer, if only for an instant, made her giddy with laughter. She spun in a circle on the deck, her robe swelling around her...and the moment was gone.

But it was enough.

"Thank you," she whispered, over and over.

This time it was Kaoru who pulled him closer, and he let her. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she placed her head against his throat and whispered his name in gratitude. Slowly his hands rose and wound themselves into her hair, lifting the dark mass and pressing it against her neck. She could hear him softly sighing her name, over and over. Smiling, Kaoru hugged him again and then leaned back, trying to see his face. She sobered in the next second as their eyes locked. All breath left her body and she lay powerless, unable and unwilling to stop him from anything he might do. His lips met hers with an urgent fire that she welcomed. Flames raced through her body as he consumed her life and her cry of rapture melted into his mouth.

The air between them became perfumed with the scent rising off their bodies. Kaoru suffered a moment of uneasiness, knowing she had no experience, almost no knowledge, of how to please the man in her arms. Then, in the next second, the problem was removed as the arms that held her relaxed, slowly, reluctantly, drawing away. Puzzled, she felt protestations rising to her lips.

"Why?" .

"I’m sorry," he whispered thickly, "But I can’t...I can’t, I’m not ready. I’m sorry."

The overwhelming feeling of selfishness died in the admission and she drew him down to her throat, hugging his head. "Sleep, Kenshin," she cooed with a smile in her heart. "Sleep, and I promise you this was a dream. When we wake at dawn, we’ll both have had the sweetest dream."

She felt him nod against her chest, and then she released him into the fragrant night.

 

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